Out

We all know why homosexuals need to come out. Staying in creates debilitating stress, mental anguish, emotional problems, cancer, you name it. Pretending to be someone or something you aren't is difficult at best, and at worst will kill you. Just ask anyone what it was like before they came out.

So what about bisexuals? Since I like women, I can pretend easily enough. I can fool anyone, in fact I have done all my life. No one ever need know that I can also be attracted to men, transgenders, genderqueers, intersexuals, straights, queers and lesbians. Pretending would make my life so much easier, wouldn't you think? I can easily seem 'normal' and blend in. And quite frankly what I'm into is no one else's business.

Except that the world just plainly assumes I'm straight. If I'm not gay, then I must be 'normal' (read straight). In fact, everyone assumes that I'm normal, just because I'm obviously not gay. The thing so many people don't get is that I'm NOT gay, but I'm not straight either, and that label fits or suits me no better than gay. Sometimes I want to scream from the tops of buildings "I'm not straight!".

"So what are you then?" people want to know. Poor, poor straight people. It's only taken modern mainstream humanity decades to deal with two sexual orientations, now they have to learn three? Little do they know.

Regardless, I don't want to be taken for straight. I'm bisexual. The label doesn't really fit either, since it implies that I like two things and I'm actually not restricted to two, but it's all I have and I would rather wear it even if it doesn't fit, than wear straight.

So then where to from here, how can I educate the whole world? Get them to understand there is more than two choices, or three. Perhaps I need help from the history books. How did the gay rights movement really get some steam?

One thing's for sure, not by staying in the closet.

The thing about bisexuality is...

The thing about bisexuality is that it doesn't matter which genitals you get.

So many pseudo-bisexual-populars seem to think of the bisexual orientation as a golden ticket to have a complete set of all genital makes and models at all times.

When your attractions to people are primarily based on internal qualities, charm, warmth, openness, honesty, sense of humour, intelligence, endeavour, spirit, you quickly realise that gender doesn't matter. Bisexuality to me is when you can fall in love with someone based on these qualities and without regard for which style of genital apparatus they are attached to.

Not to assume that genital apparatus can adequately describe someone's gender. Gender is a continuum, not a binary digit. A person's gender identity can differ from his or her anatomical gender.

To suppose your boyfriend won't mind sharing you, just because you're a 'bisexual', is just sad and ignorant. Having a bisexual orientation is not a license to cheat. It is an opportunity to love someone deeper and beyond their gender. Something precious. Giving it to more than one person at the same time is polyamory, not bisexuality. Perhaps you should ask your partner if he will share you, because you're polyamorous? See how far you get with that one.

Is it any wonder that bisexuals struggle so hard even for a title?